


Baby Eliza

by orphan_account



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Cursing for no reason, Eliza curses, Gay, Humor, Lams - Freeform, Lams is not important in this fic, M/M, gay shit, im sorry lin, she is no longer 2 pure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-03
Updated: 2017-06-03
Packaged: 2018-11-08 09:14:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11078547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Eliza is a 4-year old with seniors in high school attempting to take care of her.





	Baby Eliza

"Oh my god, thank you for coming, guys," Peggy cried with an exhausted look on their face.  
"It's okay," Hercules shrugged, "Laf, Alex, John, and I weren't doing anything important." He added with a glare in Laf's direction.  
"Finding continuity errors in the movie, Hercules is fun!" Laf said with a grin.  
Peggy smiled and opened the door wider to let the four boys in.  
"Angelica is feeding Eliza in the kitchen. You know where that is, since you guys live here."  
Alex, John, Laf, and Herc shared an apartment with the Schuyler Sisters, but they went out to Dairy Queen together, which had happened to be playing the movie Hercules at the time.  
There was a shriek from the kitchen, so Peggy and the Revolutionary Squad bolted in there, only to find an exasperated Angelica and a satisfied Eliza, sitting with her arms crossed in her light blue baby chair.  
"Does Eliza really need that chair?" John asked Angelica, pointing at the 4-year old.  
"Yes," Angelica replied curtly, then scooping some peas onto a spoon.  
"Candy!!" Eliza shouted, flailing her arms in the air.  
"No, Eliza," Hercules said, stepping in, "No candy before dinner. It'll ruin your appetite."  
"Whazz a apple bite?" Eliza asked, tilting her small head to the side.  
Alex smiled and said in a mysterious voice, "You don't want to know."  
Eliza squealed in terror and took a bite of her peas, and rapidly finished the small bowl Angelica had given her.  
"Fuck!" She declared happily.  
"Oh my god, Eliza, where did you hear that?" Peggy asked, nervous that Eliza was spreading her knowledge of profanities at school.  
"I heard it from Johnny and Lexi's room. There was lots of moaning too, so I figgered that they were happy. That's why I said it. I am happy because those pee tasted good!"  
"Johnny" and "Lexi" gave a nervous laugh, glancing at each other with knowing eyes.  
"Oh my fucking god," Hercules muttered.  
"Hercules!" Peggy shouted, "Watch your damn mouth!"  
"Stop cursing!" Laf screeched, "But I think we need to go over what our little lovebirds can and cannot do while Eliza is home."  
"No s- I mean, no reproduction," Angelica said.  
John and Alex burst out laughing at that, and John said through wheezes:  
"We can't exactly reproduce, if ya know what I mean."  
Everybody except the lovebirds face palmed, Eliza keeping her hand on her face for a while.  
"You get the point," Peggy said.  
"But when can we!" Alex piped up, "Eliza is always home whenever we're home!"  
Hercules snorted after really thinking about what their conversation topic was.  
"I dunno, just tell us in advance and we'll bring Eliza somewhere," Angelica suggested.  
"Oh, so we're just supposed to go up to you like, 'Hey Angelica, Lexi and I have some reproduction to do, so could you go bring Eliza out on a dinner date or something'?" John asked hysterically.  
Laf, Herc, Peggy, and Angelica burst out laughing.  
"Oh mon ami," Laf said through chuckles, "we are too, how you say, interested in your love life. How about you just move out and you can reproduce daily?"  
"Can we talk about this later?" Alex asked, wincing in actual, physical pain.  
"Fine," Peggy replied.  
"But no reproduction until we do talk about it."  
John and Alex shared a look that meant, "Yeah, we're not going to listen to her."  
Eliza shouted the curse again and Peggy said to Eliza, "No, you don't say that. It's mean."  
Eliza frowned. "Mean? Well, if someone's mean, then I'll say it!"  
"No!" Angelica demanded fiercely, "Never say it."  
"Fuck you!" Eliza shouted at her sister.  
It took all the effort they had to stop the Revolutionary Squad from bursting out in laughter.  
"Eliza, say that and you're getting a time out," Angelica said.  
"For how long?" Eliza asked, suspicious of her sister.  
"For one billion years," Peggy said over-dramatically, pushing Angelica and going right in front of Eliza's face.  
Eliza gave this look of pure horror and said, "I won't say it again! I can't go back there! You guys don't give me lunchables! I don't get to color! I have to stare at a wall!"  
Angelica nodded her head and said, "It's nap time, let's go upstairs."  
"No!" Eliza cried, pouting like a... like a baby. "I wanna talk to da stationary crew!"  
"It's the Revolutionary Crew,"  
Laurens said, smiling.  
"I don't care, Johnny. I wanna talk to Hercules and Marie," Eliza screeched, running over to hug Hercules' leg. Alex opened his mouth to mention that he was there, but Eliza interrupted him by saying, "Lexi can go back home now. He is of no use anymore."  
"Uhh.." Alex replied slowly, "I sort of live here, Eliza."  
"So do I," Eliza shot back. Alexander realized that the argument would just be pointless statements shot back and forth, so he stayed quiet.  
"Hercules?" Eliza asked.  
"Yes?"  
"What would happen if Peggy exploded?"  
"Right now?"  
"Right now."  
"Well, since all 6 of us are so close to her, we'd probably all be exploded by the explosion," Hercules reasoned.  
Eliza nodded her head and let go of Hercules' leg. "Bye-bye! I need to nap now."  
"Sleep is for the weak!" Laf shouted.  
"I like weekends," Eliza replied cheerfully, bounding up the stairs.  
"So about that reproduction..." Peggy asked once Eliza was out of earshot.


End file.
